QUOTES!
UNDER CONSTRUCTION!
"I need trepanning like i need a hole in the head" -- randy random
"LET ME IN THE FREAKIN HOUSE!" -- marky mark walberg?
"My bands hardcore , like green day!" -- bill mcdonald
"Yes sir , jose chavez e chavez, hes a MEXICAN indian! how'd that be?" -- emilio estavez
"I aint got time to bleed" -- jesse ventura
"Hows about a little bit of the ultraviolence" -- clockwork orange
"CHEST!!!!!!!" -- andy, the muscle bound guy at the gym that yells things to motivate people. this was his response to peter 'pete' saying he was working on his chest that night
"Hey isn't this you with Tommy lasorda?...........i HATE TOMMY lasorda!" -- Erwin FLetcher
"WHy dont' you two go down to the gym and pump eachother" -- fletch
"HEres to all that georgeous SNAAAAATCH in F, L , A" -- slap shot
"Dah...AH...AAAAAAAaaaaaaaaaaaah!" -- mr. glass ( samuel L jackson)
"the names not boy.............its ROY" -- roy munson
"If corky'da really had two guns instead of justa big dick he'd still be alive" -- gene hackman in 'unforgiven'
"sucks to your assmar" - lord of the flys "Skittlebrau" - h simpson's skittles and beer
"Too soon Jr." -- johnny tran
"More than you can afford buddy ..... FA-RA-Riiiiiii" -- fast and the furious
"He had a spare" -- action jackson in response to 'you nearly took his arm off!'
"MORE like........NOBODY!" -- can't hardly wait
"what ales me" -- peter pete drinking an ale
"BUT DAD! i wanna haul ass!" -- peter pete convincing dad to buy a truck after showing him a poster with 4 women in the bed of a truck with a licence plate saying 'haul ass'
"commitment to excellence my ass, commitment to shit is more like it, no wonder thats on our toilet" -- ME looking at our 'commitment to excellence sign' on the bathroom door
"equal pay for equal work....they ought to make a couple quarters for that play"
charles barkley commenting on a WNBA game
"Priceless Olympic Pins for half the price. " -- randy email
"You seen this dr. pepper ad with garth brooks? Talk abouta freakin feild trip to the mongaloid farm" -- phil henry
"I break it down so you don't have to" -- nsynch dance teacher
"Hey Homeskins" -- craig
"LOOK paw, theys blood" -- kevin martin -- 'green mile' redkneck
"tongue punch the butterbean" -- brandon wheeler on oral sex
""open up a can of wipeass" -- J finley
"President of Bowie State University Maryland refers to university marching band as "faggot dancing" "
"its like he's gonna have a heartattack"- redman from AZ, said JUST before rick flare actually HAD a heart attack, talk about foot in mouth!
"Thats the most non leathal military vehicle ever built!" -- mystery men
"Enjoyment tip: do not engage in any activity that would cause this or any other hard candy to lodge in throat." -- starburst candy
(Excerpt from instructions on a set of temporary tattoos featuring Toucan Sam, found in a box of Froot Loops fruit snacks.)
"Stays on for up to two weeks--even in swimming pools!"
and "Chlorinated water may cause removal of tattoo."
"Much adue about backsplash" - j finley
"Corn speckled toilet trout" - me?
barry bonds 70th homerun ball catching fan -- "I had a rush of estrogen, and THEN i knew jesus was coming!"
"PRops means Propper recognition...'s ... So Recogz for short"
"That guys BOOTIN IT like a sprint runner, like fontaine!"
"Don't leave class early, or I"LL PUT SNAKES IN YOUR BELLY!" -- crazy EUGENE, anthro proff
"DId HEEEEEeeeee call it a vest?" -- Caz when talking about a flipper babies 'jacket'
"GAAAAAAAAAY buttsex!" -- caz or finley warding off curious cops
" Oh thats alright, I'll just go upstairs and masterbate" -Joe montana
" Whats this on my shirt? Why its the town penis!" - Mike jennings
" YEah! YOu're goin real fast now aren't ya buddy fuck meat!" -Peter "pete"
" BLOW ME WHILE I SHIT!" --- E shamay
" How to breakdance, Step one, Simply start break dancing!" -Mike "BREAKER" Garcia
" Oh theres, nothin in here but uh... oh a beer belly, and um.... A COUPLE BULLETS FOR YOU!" - James Bullushi
" YOu damned Dogs! I'm gonna skin you and make ya into boots!" -me while yelling at my neighbors dogs
"here come the tracers" -- playing armymen 3d, basicaly means OH SHIT!
"I gota gal that lives on the hill, she won't do it BUT her sister will when she boogie..... She Do the TUBE-steak boogie" - ZZ top
"Rectum, DAMN NEAR KILLED HIM!" - Chris Farley
" THE BALLBAG INSTITUTE, 'notice how this ballbag cures the common cold' "-me
" hahh, Jean claude van BALLBAG!"
"WHy you gotta be shittin on my matches?!"
"I hope your anus doesn't fall out" -eric
"special basket.....SPECIAL BASKET.........SPECIAL BAAAAASKET!!!"
-eric hinting at what to order
"Hey wait a second guys........... THIS BEERS STILL GOOD!"
-Me after finding an open beer the next day
"Never knock at Death's door. Just ring the doorbell and run (he hates that)".
"Geeze She's smokin like a fish!" Mom
"AH ya look like uh...... Uh...... Whats his name, Dumbo the giant and the beanstalk!" Pops
" I'm sweatin like a fat elvis!" - Mark Duffeild
" Shmo Dih?" Supposed to be smoke Dick more info
here
"THey're sellin used underwear at goodwill! USED BREIFS!" --???
HILLARIOUS LIFE LESSON
George carlins STUPID PEOPLE!
QUOTES!
UNDER CONSTRUCTION!
